Chapter 20 - Your Calendar is Your Character

Imani Rhodes

Alright, Miles, let me hit you with this: If your calendar was a mirror, what would it say about you? Like, if someone peeked at your schedule, would they see a leader, a learner, or just... a professional firefighter putting out everyone else’s emergencies?

Miles Carter

Ooh, that’s a little too real, Imani. I mean, I’ve definitely had weeks where my calendar looked like a game of Tetris played by someone who’s never seen Tetris. But you’re right—how we use our time is critically important. James Clear talks about this in Atomic Habits, right? Every action is a vote for the type of person you want to be.

Imani Rhodes

Exactly. And it’s not just about what you get done, it’s about who you’re shaping yourself into. I love that idea—it's identity-based time management. Instead of asking, “What do I have to do today?” you ask, “Who am I becoming by how I use my day?” It’s a subtle shift, but it’s powerful. It’s something we’ve circled around in past episodes, like when we talked about intentional language and controlling the controllables. This is just the next layer—your actions, and your words.

Miles Carter

Yeah, and there’s research to back it up. People who block time for planning are a third more likely to hit their long-term goals. —structure matters. And it’s not about being rigid, it’s about being intentional. Top performers don’t just manage time to get more done, they use it to reinforce the kind of person they want to be. That’s the real flex.

Imani Rhodes

And it’s not just for CEOs or, you know, the “calendar elite.” I’ve seen this with new managers, with folks in the field, even with artists. The way you plan your day is the way you live your life. If you want to be someone who leads, or creates, or just feels less scattered, it starts with those tiny, daily choices. It’s like, your calendar is your character—literally.

Miles Carter

That’s a phrase I want on a mug. “Your calendar is your character.” I mean, it’s true. And it’s not about perfection. It’s about progress. You don’t have to overhaul your life overnight. Just start with one block, one habit, one vote for the person you want to be. Your calendar is a powerful often underutilized-tool. It's the secret of the pros.

Imani Rhodes

Agreed. So let’s get practical. There’s this research from Ron Friedman—he’s a psychologist, writes for Harvard Business Review. He says the first 10 to 15 minutes of-your-morning? -That’s prime time. Like, your brain is basically a fresh canvas, and what you put on it sets the tone for your whole day.

Miles Carter

Yeah, and he’s not just making that up. The data shows that if you spend those first few minutes planning—before you check email, before you let the world in—you actually reduce task anxiety and boost your focus. I had a client, manufacturing firm, super busy environment. We started having him schedule all his key decisions before 10am. Within a month, his decision fatigue was cut in half. He wasn’t just reacting all day—he was actually steering the ship.

Imani Rhodes

That’s so good. And it’s not about having some fancy planner or, you know, a color-coded system—though, I do love a good highlighter. It’s about being proactive. Ask yourself, “If I leave work today feeling accomplished, what did I actually do?” That’s your anchor. And then you can use strategies like time blocking—Cal Newport is big on this. Block out your deep work, your admin, even your breaks. If it’s not on the calendar, it’s basically make-believe.

Miles Carter

Totally. And I like the 3–2–1 rule for folks who want something simple. Three key outcomes for the week, two deep work blocks per day, one planning session every morning. That’s it. You don’t need a 47-step system. Just a rhythm that works for you. And, honestly, the people who do this aren’t working more—they’re just working with more clarity. Like, Imani, remember that landscaping crew story? The tech who never writes anything down versus the lead who has her “morning map” checklist. One’s in chaos, one’s in control. It’s not about doing more, it’s about planning better.

Imani Rhodes

And it’s the same in every field. Restaurant servers, salespeople, IT pros—those who prep, who block, who plan, they get the better tables, the better results, the better days. Your prep is your paycheck. I mean, that’s a phrase I want people to steal. And if you’re listening, try it tomorrow. Ten minutes. No email, no news, just you and your plan. See what happens.

Miles Carter

So, let’s talk about what actually changes when you do this. There’s a BYU study—time management isn’t just about getting more done. It’s about feeling less stressed, being more satisfied, and actually performing better at work. But here’s the catch: it only works if you feel like you own your time. If you’re just following someone else’s plan, you don’t get the same benefits.

Imani Rhodes

That’s huge. It’s not just about the-checklist, it’s about the-mindset. You have to feel in control. And there’s more. BMC Psychology found that when students managed their time well, they had more self-control, less phone distraction, and were more engaged. It’s like, the more you plan, the more you actually show up for your own life. And that’s true for adults, too, not just students.

Miles Carter

Yeah, and I’ll be real—I learned this the hard way. Back in my consulting days, I used to plan my week, but I never tracked where my time actually went. When I finally did, I realized I had these “invisible hours”—time that just disappeared. Once I started tracking, I felt way more in control. It wasn’t about being perfect, it was about being honest with myself. That’s when things shifted.

Imani Rhodes

And there are so many tools now—Sunsama, checklists, even the anti-to-do list, where you drag tasks into your calendar instead of just making a list. The point is, planning isn’t theory. It’s practice. It’s a habit. And it’s what moves you from feeling overwhelmed to feeling intentional. Like, you’re not just surviving your day, you’re actually designing it.

Miles Carter

And that’s what we want for everyone listening. Don’t just hear this and move on. Do the action items. That’s what makes it stick. Spend ten minutes tonight—open your calendar, block time for what matters, leave some margin. And then, jump into the community feed. Share your rule—maybe it’s “no meetings before 9,” or “two deep work blocks a day.” Post it, learn from others, and help someone else get unstuck.

Imani Rhodes

Yeah. And tell us your stories! What’s your “morning map”? What’s your anti-to-do list look like? The community is there to connect and support, not just to lurk. The people who grow the fastest aren’t always the loudest —they’re the ones who plan forward, who try, who share. So, make it practical, make it real, and make it yours. We want you to be the best version of yourself, not just tomorrow, but five years from now.

Miles Carter

Alright, Imani, I think that’s a wrap for today. Remember, your calendar is your character. Don’t be the human Post-It note. If it’s not on the calendar, it’s make-believe. We’ll see you next time.

Imani Rhodes

Thanks, Miles. And thanks to everyone listening. Go do the thing—then come tell us about it. Until next time, keep building, keep planning, and keep showing up for yourself.